Step 1- Unmanageable

Unmanageable:  difficult or impossible to control, use, or manipulate

Step 1: We admitted that we were powerless over our addiction(s) and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

Welcome back folks.  Last time we began with the unmanageable part of this step.  However, it seems that there is a group of us out there that has as much trouble swallowing the “that our lives had become unmanageable” part as there is a group of us that took issue with the “we were powerless” part. 

So, we are cutting to the chase and/or quick with this post.  Surprisingly, there are a lot of us out there that have an issue with admitting that our lives had become unmanageable.  Because they still have a family, a home, a vehicle, a job, etc., they fail to recognize the “real” unmanageable areas that this Step is talking about.

They view themselves as “better” or “luckier” than the rest of us.  “We” show up to meetings walking or on bicycles.  “We” live in shelters or half-way houses. “Our” families have disowned us. “We” are either unemployed or under employed.  “We” have been in jail.  “Our” lives may be unmanageable….but not theirs.

I have known many such individuals.  While a small, small number of them were truly blessed because their bottom seemed like the sky compared to ours, the majority of the folks in this group are in Denial.  Because they did not endure the hardships that most of us have, they did not grasp the “unmanageable” part and basically skipped it.

Unfortunately, most of the people in this category will end up going back out – some will return to the rooms and tables in time - some will not.  Why is that you may be asking- because of their denial, they could not or would not completely give themselves over to this simple program of Recovery.   i.e. Because they hadn’t given everything away due to their addiction, they did not think that their lives had become unmanageable.  So they cheated on that part of Step 1 and when they started to build on that loose and shaky foundation, everything collapsed on them.

Yes, they would utter the words but they did not believe nor did they have the conviction that the “unmanageable” part applied to them.  Therefore, their program foundation was unstable and could not support the other Steps when they tried to build them. 

Remember: Step 1 is the only Step that must be perfect.  There is no room for error on Step 1.  It’s the foundation upon which the other 11 Steps are supported.  If the foundation is faulty…..you won’t get very far in your Recovery Program.

That’s where we will pick it up next time.

Until then ……. be sure to tell a friend about us.

Thanks for visiting us – come back soon.

Remember:  “It is what it is and “it ain’t nothing but a thing!”